One of my newly acclaimed best friends, we'll call him "Arkham", has been giving me constant confusion about our "union". It took quite a lot for us to come to this agreement that that is what we are to each other, but I feel like we have so long to go before that endearing title is official.
I mostly say this because, despite how we may feel for one another, he always puts up this invisible wall between us.... I guess from his point of view, he needed to create it in order to keep me somewhat close. What kills me inside is the fact that he is always self-conscious about what it is we have. It hurts sometimes, you know. He allows other people to have control over him by letting what they say about him or both of us get to him. Where as I don't care because it's none of their business unless I find them worthy to know.
A few months ago, I deleted him off of Facebook and Snapchat... But it was only because he grew distant from me... And that hurt more than ever. He said he didn't want to hurt me by telling me, but instead he took the coward way out and allowed me to hurt every day for months... Nothing's really changed... In fact, we got into a wretched misunderstanding which resulted in him not wanting to learn how to drive stick anymore.
I recently asked him what it was we could do together since he won't add me back and since we're proclaimed best friends, but all he could say was "no comment". I feel like I may be played for a loop... I don't see how you can be someone's best friend and treat them like this... To treat them like they don't mean anything to you... I admit I try too hard, and that is my fault... But I'm tired of being punished for misunderstandings and his insecurities...
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