Developing.
It’s been a little minute since I posted on here. I’ve been thinking a lot lately because of my horoscope and events that have taken place as well. I don’t know if it’s bad to say this but ever since my mother has been gone in Jamaica
I’m still hunting for jobs.. and thankfully Daniel, my boyfriend, and my Dad are helping me constantly till I land something better. I had made a promise to myself and to them that I would keep my head up and keep trying to get out of here. A lot of companies are really anal about experience or even when it comes to interviews…. I’m so sick of this airport, and the job I currently have. No one has called me back yet, not even the recruiter that contacted me to get me signed on with Delta as their Communications Coordinator. Might as well call that quits xP lol.
In other news, my relationship with Daniel is having some interesting effects on me. I realize that the more time we spend together on a daily basis in person the more my emotions and feelings start to develop more and a lot more solid. We both agree that a gap is missing between our time together, in the sense that it still feels rushed sort of and even like something is missing. We didn’t really go on too many dates…, which I regret a lot lol. We’re missing the dates aspect of our relationship. We hardly go on any to begin with lol…, which I don’t want to compare, but it’s becoming a repeat of my relationships in the past where we hardly go anywhere to really strengthen the relationship, and get to know each other better. We have been to the mall twice, Applebees, and even the movies twice, but not like oh let me sweep you off your feet and make you fall in love with me and I impress you dates lol…. I was hoping for that from the beginning of us talking lol. Sometimes I feel unsure about myself in the relationship because we are missing a huge gap of getting to know each other on dates…. Like I kind of hate asking certain questions about certain things pertaining to our relationship. Questions like, “Who should pay, and at what point do I have to pay or put in half from your standpoint?” Questions like those should be already answered prior to getting together because the dates we go on would give me an idea of what to expect in our relationship. It’s a little awkward for me to ask questions like that lol.
On the other hand, I am happy that he swooped me up, and was eager to claim me as his own ^.^ I just want to be head over heels for him and over the moon for him instead of just I love you and everything about you lol. He didn’t really give me the opportunity to really fall for him. Which is why when we were talking at first, he was building up to it making me yearn for him and things like our first kiss :$. And I did want to be with him no doubt, it’s just… where’s the story? Where the we were on X amount of dates and he romantically asked me out under the stars or something lol xD. I mean it doesn’t have to be like that romantic or something, but I don’t know… I really feel like not only did I make things easy for him, but that I didn’t really get the opportunity to make him earn me…. And to be honest, I would feel cheap and easy if he wasn’t so sweet and loving to me lol. It shows me that he doesn’t take me for granted despite how quickly we got together. I really can say that I do love him :$.
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